Returning to Egypt

by Hannah De Cleene | Jul 17, 2023 | Theology

Old habits — we all have some unhelpful patterns that we’ve learned to break, haven’t we? From biting nails to eating too much junk food to refusing to make the bed, we’ve learned the value of making better decisions. But that didn’t happen overnight, and if we are not careful, slipping into those oh-so-familiar habits can become second nature at the drop of a hat. And the same could be said of us spiritually too.

In Deuteronomy 17, God gives clear instructions for what to do if Israel wants a king when they come into the land:

“When you come to the land that the Lord your God is giving you, and you possess it and dwell in it and then say, ‘I will set a king over me, like all the nations that are around me,’ you may indeed set a king over you whom the Lord your God will choose. One from among your brothers you shall set as king over you. You may not put a foreigner over you, who is not your brother. Only he must not acquire many horses for himself or cause the people to return to Egypt in order to acquire many horses since the Lord has said to you, ‘You shall never return that way again.’ And he shall not acquire many wives for himself, lest his heart turn away, nor shall he acquire for himself excessive silver and gold.”
‭‭Deuteronomy‬ ‭17:14-17‬

Even though Israel was a distinct nation with God as their King, He knew they would someday want an earthly king and so gave them specific instructions through Moses. One thing I’d never noticed before: The king must not ever cause the people to return to Egypt because “the Lord has said to you, ‘You shall never return that way again.’”

God had delivered them from slavery in Egypt, but how many times did they want to go back, even on the journey to the promised land? And now, God is speaking through Moses to the people, “You shall never return that way again.”

The Draw of Egypt

Egypt is the past, the old life of slavery – remember they had cried out to God for deliverance – but when times got tough where did they want to go? Back to Egypt.

The warnings to the future king in Deuteronomy 17: Don’t go to Egypt for horses, don’t marry foreign wives, and don’t gather abundant silver and gold. These instructions were all violated by King Solomon, who, humanly speaking was the wisest man ever, but human wisdom didn’t help him when he disregarded the Word of God. Not only did he go to Egypt for horses, he made a marriage alliance with Egypt, and then proceeded to add wives, concubines, and all sorts of riches, leading his heart, and the nation, astray. Things continued downhill for Israel, as king after king followed his own ways, with the occasional bright spot – a king who followed God “with the whole heart.”

But, for Israel and Judah, running away was the standard. We see it clearly in Jeremiah 41 and 42. The remnant of God’s people were in captivity but rather than listen to the prophet Jeremiah, stay where they were, and trust God to care for them, the people determined to go to Egypt.

God said clearly, “Don’t go to Egypt.” But they did. And their fears – all the things God said would happen – found them in Egypt.

When it comes to our own fears, are we any different?
When things get hard, where do we run, to the Lord or back to our own Egypt – to things that enslaved me in the past but God has delivered me from, yet I’m tempted to run back to when I’m tired, overwhelmed, disappointed…where do I put my hope on the hard days?

The Danger of Our Own Egypt

If fear of man can clamor for our attention, we can be prone to compromise. We make decisions from a place of insecurity because we care more about pleasing people than God. Our identity has become more connected with what man says than God. And, if this sin goes unconfessed, the reaction becomes a consistent pattern, just like the Israelites turning to a human king rather than their Heavenly One.

Or maybe, when life gets overwhelming and bleak, we over-rely on ourselves. We decide we must pull ourselves up by our bootstraps and figure it out on our own instead of asking the Lord for wisdom and direction. In those moments, we exhaust all our human understanding before approaching the throne of grace (going directly against Proverbs 3:5-6 and Hebrews 4:16). And we forget the precious promises of the One who knows all things.

The Hope of Our True Homeland

God in Isaiah 43:2,
“When you pass through the
Waters, I will be with you;
and through the rivers, they shall
Not overwhelm you;
When you walk through fire you shall
Not be burned,
And the flame shall not consume
You.”

Jesus in Matthew 11:28-32,
“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy, and My burden is light.”

God delivered His people from Egypt and then led them through the wilderness to the Promised Land. Along the way, they were continually tempted to go back to Egypt, forgetting that there was no freedom there, only slavery.

We have been delivered by God the Father, through the life, death, burial, and resurrection of God the Son, and we have the promise of eternity with the Triune God. What an amazing promise! We are given freedom from the enslaving power of sin because of Jesus, but when times get hard, where do we go? To Jesus, who loves, comforts, and gives us rest, or to our old enslaving sin – back to Egypt?

By Your grace Lord, help me always run to You!

Take the Next Step

by Hannah De Cleene | Apr 18, 2023 | Theology

January and February are, for the average Midwesterner, long, cold months. But this year, I experienced one of my most treasured adventures with the Lord during these months. 

Six weeks in a new country with a family I barely knew might sound like a disaster waiting to happen, but that could not be further from the truth in this case. 

I loved every minute of this trip. 

A month and a half later I am still reminiscing about all the Lord taught me and in awe of how attentive He is to our prayers.

PRAY THE UNLIKELY PRAYERS

In January 2021, I got alone with the LORD to pray for the new year. I spent a solid 36 hours by myself. No phone, no people, just me, my journal, the Word, and some solace with my Father. I had just finished grad school, a major accomplishment. But I didn’t know what was next. What prayers should I even pray?

So I just started writing. I penned a few ideas that I thought, just maybe, God could use somehow. I asked the Lord to direct so that any hopes and dreams on the page would align with the story He wanted to write. 

One of the sweetest gifts the Lord has given me is this: I’ve been able to see firsthand how He works in different countries and cultures. Missions will always be near and dear to my heart, as are missionaries. I asked the Lord if there would be a way He could use the heart for missions He gave me along with the gift of singleness. Maybe there would be a way I could go and encourage and live life with a few of them somehow, someway. 

This wasn’t a prayer I prayed often, but from time to time, the idea would come to mind. A year and a half later, God opened a bigger door than I imagined. I got to spend time with missionaries, and my dad and I even got to do this trip together. How cool is that? 

LIFE IS BETTER TOGETHER 

Before I made my journey to Sol de la Molina (the name of the neighborhood), my normal everyday consisted of working in my home by myself. Yes, sometimes I worked at coffee shops, but for the most part, I worked diligently in my quiet, home office. I was a tad nervous as to how well I could work in a house full of people (and two giant dogs). Would I fall behind?

The opposite turned out to be true. 

From quick chats while I made my coffee to family lunches to jogs after work, good conversations threaded the entire day. They weren’t distractions but connectors, a constant reminder that life was not all about me or my responsibilities. 

Yes, God calls us to be faithful in the jobs He gives us, but without seeing it, I had made my job too central. A little bit of my identity started to get wrapped up in how well I could do in my work and what feedback I received from managers and clients – all thoughts that focused on myself. 

However, in Lima, I became an adopted big sister, daughter, and dear friend. We did life together in a way that brought joy and encouragement that I still struggle to put into words. We helped each other, whether it was making a meal or trying to figure out how to write an essay on math, we jumped in to help. We served together, we laughed together, we prayed together, and we stayed up late watching movies together. Without even realizing it, work became less stressful and burdensome, even with the extra responsibilities I received at that time. 

SAYING YES IS SCARY BUT WORTH IT

One of my prayers was that I would jump in wherever needed in my six weeks. The reality was, I didn’t have a clue what that would be like.

A few days into the trip, I was asked if I could do some teaching for the young adult women’s study. I said yes, then immediately this fearful thought: “I just said yes to something I’ve never done. What am I thinking!?”

Teaching is a joy, and I’ve been able to share in various capacities over the years, but never like this—completely in Spanish. How was this going to go? 

I knew the Spirit wanted me to say yes, but that didn’t take the nerves away. I often thought of one of my favorite Elisabeth Elliot quotes, “Sometimes the fear does not subside and you must do it afraid.” 

And that fear kept me coming back to the Lord. I didn’t know exactly how to say what I wanted, I didn’t remember how to conjugate all the verbs correctly, and the list went on. But God. God wanted me to trust Him and take the next step.

And can I tell you teaching was one of my highlights! I still got nervous every time, but I loved sharing the truth from the Word, and God gave me the grace for that day. Obedience often isn’t glamorous but in the eyes of the Lord, our obedience is always beautiful. It’s an outward demonstration that we trust Him and want to walk in His ways, even when we can’t see exactly what’s going on.

GOD DOESN’T NEED ME BUT WANTS TO USE ME

Did God need me to go to Peru? No. But He wanted me to. He wanted to use me. 

Years ago I read John Piper’s poem on Job, and there is this line that replays often in my mind: “God is kind in ways that will not fit my mind.” 

God is the creator of the world, the Sovereign One who holds time in His hand. And, He knows My name. He’s given me experiences that He alone orchestrated. And He wants to keep using me, just like He wants to use you. 

God gave me a childhood in South America, an opportunity to learn Spanish at a young age, an enjoyment in living in different cultures, an excitement to travel, and a sweet season of singleness, just to name a few things. He did all of that. No one has pursued me like the Lord. No one knows my life and heart like the Lord, including my own sinful, selfish heart. And yet He still loves me because that is who He is. 

I hope we never move on from being in awe of who He is and what He’s done. And I pray others may see His beauty and character as we walk in obedience in any opportunity He puts before us.

For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.

Ephesians 2:10